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Club News

Sep. 4, 2000

 

Sadomasochistic women caught hacking our email list!

 

Rats take the Gold in Edmonton!

 

Rats Women kick some XY chromosome butts!

 

Newspaper articles on the Edmonton Festival

Habib: Paddler of the Week

 

Schedule 2000

 

Kelowna: here we come

 

SADOMASOCHIST WOMEN CAUGHT HACKING OUR CLUB EMAIL LIST!

On Sep 12, 2000, two women from the Alberta Government were caught broadcasting lewd and suggestive emails to our membership.

After having responded to this shameful demonstration of sexual innuendo and deviant behavior, the culprits are now in custody, handcuffed in Philip's basement.

The culprits involved are now undergoing disciplinary action at the hands of Philip ("Who's Your Daddy"?) B. and Habib ("Let me at 'em!") B.

 

 

Philip caught me hacking the email list!  I should be punished!

 

RATS OVERRUN EDMONTON FESTIVAL! 

Like swarms of unstoppable rodents, the EDBRC River Rats dominated the Edmonton DB Festival. These blue-skinned critters squirmed their way into every nook and cranny on the festival site, and then scurried away with 2 gold medals and one silver medal!

After the smoke cleared, the final tally was:

River Rats 1: Fastest Team Overall, gold medal

River Rats Too: Aurora B Division, silver medal

Muskrats Womens Team: Borealis C Division, gold medal

 

MUSKRAT WOMEN KICK THE MENS BUTTS!

Special congratulations to our all-women paddlers, the EDBRC “Muskrats”, who beat multiple co-ed teams to take the Borealis C division gold.  

"We're not getting beat by no girlies” 

-a quickly-humbled male
paddler.

"Wow... those girls are babes!"

-an amorous fireman in the beer tent

"Holy #%$&@! Those chicks are good!"

-a spectator beside the finish line

"Holy SH*T!  They won!"

-another  spectator beside the finish line

 

RATS TOO CREW SHOWS THEIR STROKES

The “River Rats Too” paddling team managed a silver medal in their Aurora B Division, losing by ¼ boat length to the very strong Nordic Ski Club.  Excellent work, Rats Too!  

"Is that Phillip who's out of time?"

-a spectator

"No, that just looks like Phillip..."

-another spectator

 

RATS 1 WINS FASTEST BOAT HONOR 

Big congratulations to the “River Rats 1” paddling team, who is the first ever Edmonton team to take the Festival gold medal away from the very strong City Police team!  The final race was a tough heat, but the Rats 1 boat surged ahead in the last 50 metres to take the gold away from the Calgary Magic Dragons and the City Police.  

"Eeeeeyaaaaahhhh!!!!!!!!"

-Sheila during the final race

"huff, huff, cough, gag, gag..."

-Dennis after the final race

"Power stroke? The whole race was a power stroke!!"

-Kaye at the docks after the final race

 

Thank you to all the terrific Edmonton paddlers who have made the EDBRC a winning club in its first year of competition!

 

 

Red Dog!  Pull Pull Pull!

 

 

 

Our beautiful womens team

 

 

 

Female Muskrats: paddles up!

 

 

 

"Rats Too" barely lost to the Nordic Ski Club

 

 

 

Pop the champagne... we won the gold!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

More Rats and Festival News: Newspaper articles on the Edmonton Festival