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SADOMASOCHIST WOMEN CAUGHT HACKING OUR CLUB EMAIL LIST! On Sep 12, 2000, two women from the Alberta Government were caught broadcasting lewd and suggestive emails to our membership. After having responded to this shameful demonstration of sexual innuendo and deviant behavior, the culprits are now in custody, handcuffed in Philip's basement. The culprits involved are now undergoing disciplinary action at the hands of Philip ("Who's Your Daddy"?) B. and Habib ("Let me at 'em!") B.
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RATS OVERRUN EDMONTON FESTIVAL! Like swarms of unstoppable rodents, the EDBRC River Rats dominated the Edmonton DB Festival. These blue-skinned critters squirmed their way into every nook and cranny on the festival site, and then scurried away with 2 gold medals and one silver medal! After the smoke cleared, the final tally was: River Rats 1: Fastest Team Overall, gold medal River Rats Too Muskrats Womens Team: Borealis C Division, gold medal
MUSKRAT WOMEN KICK THE MENS BUTTS! Special congratulations to our all-women paddlers, the EDBRC Muskrats, who beat multiple co-ed teams to take the Borealis C division gold. "We're not getting beat by no girlies
"Wow... those girls are babes!"
"Holy #%$&@! Those chicks are good!"
"Holy SH*T! They won!"
RATS TOO CREW SHOWS THEIR STROKES The River Rats Too
paddling team managed a silver medal in their Aurora B Division, losing by ¼ boat length
to the very strong Nordic Ski Club. Excellent work, Rats
Too! "Is that Phillip who's out of time?"
"No, that just looks like Phillip..."
RATS 1 WINS FASTEST BOAT HONOR Big
congratulations to the River Rats 1 paddling team, who is the first ever
Edmonton team to take the Festival gold medal away from the very strong City Police
team! The final
race was a tough heat, but the Rats 1 boat surged ahead in the last 50 metres to take the
gold away from the Calgary Magic Dragons and the City Police. "Eeeeeyaaaaahhhh!!!!!!!!" "huff, huff, cough, gag, gag..."
"Power stroke? The whole race was a power stroke!!"
Thank you to all the
terrific Edmonton paddlers who have made the EDBRC a winning club in its first year of
competition! |
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